Sunday, April 14, 2013

impotent

The measure of my incompletion is the unsettle of your gaze as it weaves and as it wanders the jungle of this disarray. There is no blow that could hurt further, no strike or wound that will injure more. You lie and flirt with calamitous abandon. You reject me with each heart beat, betray me with every breath. There is nothing left to feel from you, either too cruel or clumsy to allow access. You take from me this name and number. Leave me like your soul, bereft and desolate.

Still I shall always light a candle. My window all aglow at night. While I ache and crave your smile, knowing I am only filler and you are only mirage, you toil away with other hearts and so can never have my own. Go away, though I love you dearly. Go away, though I love you true. You are only born of lies and pleasures. Go now before all you are is this evil you pursue.

I know at last that I am nothing. Your whole world a carnival. Paper tickets and words like honey. Nothing but breath to keep you warm. Time undoes as it devours. The truth some sound like teeth grinding bone. My life bereft, my wings at once shattered. Dream your dreams without my witness. Live your life with someone else to humiliate and mock. I love you, but I know now how little that ever meant. Love someone true and without ruin.

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